If Only review, Minerva Theatre Chichester

On the drive back from David Edgar's new play, If Only, I listened to The Week in Westminster on Radio 4.  It was an infinitely more interesting experience because each story is just a soundbite. The same is not true of If Only. The first half is a very detailed trot through the 2010 manifestos of our three main political parties. Set in the week the Icelandic dust cloud created travel chaos, we find ourselves in a Spanish airport. Tory MP, Peter, still smarting from being fingered  in the expenses row, is making small talk with Lib Dem policy wonk, Jo. They're stranded after attending the same wedding. As they discuss the first leadership debate, in wanders Labour insider, Sam, trying to get home from a fact-finding mission.

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The unlikely trio buy a dilapidated Peugeot convertible and start to drive home, picking up a teenage ingenue, Hannah, en route. Hannah's a smart cookie. She comes up with a parable - about camels - that sums up the choices facing the parties as they go into an election where no wins are guaranteed. The scene is set for fun, and there are some merry moments of game playing and deal making, but mainly it's a lot of grandstanding. Grandstanding passes for politics these days - each side shouts what it believes is best, and despises the opposition for disagreeing. There's no debate, no reasoning, no empathy, no warmth - just righteous statements, and all of them stale.


In the second half, we're eight months from the 2015 election and UKIP's shadow is blocking the sun. The Tories are about to renege on their coalition compromises by aggressively chasing the UKIP vote and withdrawing from all Human Rights agreements, outlawing Romanians, and generally acting reprehensibly. It's all a bit complex and hard to follow, but the crux is that Peter considers this change untenable and the three regroup to consider taking action. One of the their number must sacrifice his or her career to scupper Cameron's plan. Question: do we either believe the scenario or care?

In conclusion: If Only is hampered by reflecting British politics honestly. It embodies the lack of instinct, imagination and innovation in modern political discourse and because of that, it's all words and no drama. Even when taking current preoccupations to an extreme, it is hot air. It will please die-hards, and disillusion the rest even more.

References
Minerva Theatre, Tickets
Charles Spencer review in The Daily Telegraph


Minerva Theatre/Chichester Festival Theatre Oaklands Park, Chichester, West Sussex PO19 6A  Run ends July 27